News Flash!

(AP) Vatican City, Italy — In an announcement yesterday which some pundits are calling “really smooth”, the Etienne Bruvvas have been heralded by his majesty Pope John Paul George Ringo as “the three coolest guys i’ve never met,” and expressed his hope that their recently announced holy pilgramage to Vatican City would result in a new era, whereupon his Holiness would step down and crown the Bruvvas as the new “Pope-y Trifecta”, in charge of taking Catholicism in a new direction. “I hope these guys can fix this shit,” said His Holiness at a recent press conference. “Especially about the part where (the bible) should say ‘celebrate’ instead of ‘celibate’. And let’s get some snatch up in here, yo. I’m old, not dead.” Vatican City continues to make preparations for the arrival of the Bruvvas, who are reportedly arriving sometime “pretty soon for sure.”

Comments are closed.